On this episode of DETANGLE
Entitled Partners
To be honest with you, I had four long-term relationships in my life that shaped me and taught me so much about human nature. One really important lesson was all about how to deal with a partner who thinks their needs and desires are more important than yours. In this article, I am going to present to you some signs that can help you determine if your partner feels entitled. You have only one life. Don’t let anyone dictate to you how to live it!
When you’re head-over-heels for someone, you will do everything within your power to make them feel cherished and special. But sometimes, that means letting them have a sense of entitlement in the relationship. But what is this “entitlement”? Well, the answer is really simple. One of the partners feels like they have more control in the relationship than the other. This behavior can cause problems, especially if it comes from a place of feeling superior or more important.
It’s essential to remember that open communication is key, and establishing mutual respect and healthy boundaries is something that makes a relationship healthy. If you notice any signs of entitlement in your relationship, try addressing it early on before it becomes a bigger issue.
Did you know that attachment styles are truly important in a healthy and mature relationship? You can find more about them in this book.
Here are 10 warning signs that your partner may be acting entitled in your relationship, along with some advice on how to deal with it.
They Think They’re Always in the Right, and You’re Always in the Wrong
The trap of believing one partner is always correct while the other is constantly mistaken can be easy to fall into in relationships. Sometimes, our partners may feel entitled to the love and respect we give them. But the truth is that nobody is perfect, and we all make silly mistakes.
Just because your partner is “right” most of the time doesn’t mean they deserve your love and respect. In fact, thinking this way is a sign of entitlement in relationships and it can actually harm your romantic connection.
When you think your partner deserves everything from you because they’re always right, it can lead to conflicts and fights when they’re wrong. It’s important to remember that mean or hurtful behavior from your loved one is not acceptable, and if you feel hurt by it, you should act immediately.
They Make You Doubt Yourself or Your Relationship
When someone believes they are entitled to something from someone else, they may also believe it is acceptable to treat them poorly. In relationships, a sense of entitlement can lead to harmful and hurtful comments and insults. Some examples might be when your partner tells you some things that are similar to the following:
- “You’re not affectionate enough.”
- “You only think about yourself.”
- “You’re constantly getting on my nerves.”
- “You’re not successful.”
- “I would never make that decision, you must be dumb for doing that.”
It’s likely that the person you’re dating is projecting their own feelings of inferiority onto you if they constantly criticize and put you down. In other words, they might actually believe that they don’t deserve anything good in life, and try to make themselves feel better by tearing others down. This is an illustration of the phrase “If I’m not worthy, I’ll make sure you’re not either,” in action.
It’s a sad reality, but it does happen. It’s important to be aware of this kind of behavior and recognize the signs of it in a relationship.
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They Expect You to Boost Their Self-Esteem
One of the telltale signs of entitlement and privilege in a relationship is when your partner expects you to constantly boost their self-esteem. This is especially true if they struggle with the way they perceive themselves. It’s normal to want to provide love and support for your spouse, but it’s crucial to realize that this dynamic is unhealthy and that there is nothing you can do to change it if they don’t want to work together with you towards this.
As long as they rely on you to make them happy, they will never be able to fully love you, and they will always hold power over the relationship by using your feelings against you when they’re upset or angry. Instead, you should prioritize your own happiness and understand that you are enough. If your partner is experiencing low self-esteem, they must work on themselves rather than expecting you to do so.
If you want to improve the relationship, start with yourself. It’s essential to not look for external solutions for your own happiness and instead focus on unlocking your personal power to find satisfaction and fulfillment.
When you take care of yourself, it makes your relationship stronger. It is essential to put passion into everything you do and stop depending on external validation. Love yourself, believe in yourself, and you’ll see positive changes in yourself that will eventually help your relationship.
You Start to Question Your Own Worth
In a relationship, we all want to be treated with fairness and respect by our partners. However, sometimes our love and care for them can lead us to believe that they are superior and deserve better treatment. Unfortunately, this kind of thinking can lead to unhealthy dynamics and we don’t want that.
If you’re unsure if your partner is treating you poorly, here are some things to look out for:
- They make it seem like your opinions and feelings don’t matter.
- They tease or mock what you say or how you feel.
- They make jokes that you feel hurt by.
- They make decisions without seeking your input.
- They hold you responsible for everything, even if you are not at fault
- They ignore your feelings and needs, only focusing on their own.
It’s important to keep in mind that if your partner treats you in any of the following ways, it shows they don’t see you as one of their equals, which is completely disrespectful and shouldn’t happen. Nobody wants to be mistreated or disregarded, especially by their spouse or longtime partner. Be aware that you deserve to be treated fairly, respectfully, and with affection.
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They Make Choices Without Involving You or Hearing Your Thoughts
Are you feeling that your partner is disrespecting you because they make decisions that prioritize their own interests over yours? Is it true that if your relationship had been a scale, the weights would have been heavier on their side? If the answer is “yes,” this indicates selfish behavior, which is never healthy in a relationship. A mature partnership involves mutual respect, where both partners have a say in the decision-making process and consider each other’s needs.
If your partner is not involving you or taking your thoughts and feelings into account, it may be time for them to change this. If they don’t think it is necessary to make a change, maybe it is time to re-evaluate the relationship. In a strong and loving relationship, both parties should be attentive to each other’s feelings and well-being.
They Take From You Without Giving Anything in Return
It’s a common misconception that, in a relationship, we should give everything and expect nothing in return. But this is not only unrealistic, but it is also against anything that has something to do with a healthy relationship.
No matter how much your partner loves you, if they are trying to take advantage of you or they are not treating you right, it is your responsibility to put a stop to it.
This not only benefits you but also benefits the relationship itself. It can make the relationship and the bond between you and your partner stronger. It’s so important to remember that you are worthy of love, affection, and respect in your relationship. Don’t compromise your well-being by tolerating poor treatment. You know that you deserve so much better.
You Start to Feel Like You Are Less Than Them
Have you ever felt like your partner is better than you? This is a normal feeling that can be present in our lives, but it can lead to unhealthy thoughts and actions. It can make you believe that your partner somehow deserves someone better than you, and this can make you feel like your efforts are not enough. This can be damaging to your sense of self-worth and self-esteem.
If a person believes that their partner is not treating them in an appropriate way, they may typically try to excuse the behavior. They frequently criticize themselves or their lover in a desperate attempt to convince everyone that everything is okay. However, this is only a coping mechanism.
This is just a method to prevent losing the relationship or confronting their partner about the abuse they’ve been through. And it doesn’t fix anything and really makes things even worse since it keeps them from seeing when their partners are taking advantage of them.
You should also check out: 8 Signs Your Partner Is a Cheating Narcissist