When we first start a relationship, it’s obvious that we will be on our best behavior. The future inspires us, so we want to make sure that our partners fall in love with us just as we’re falling in love with them. However, soon enough we might discover that both of us fall into the same old and destructive patterns.

Even if our lovers have nothing in common with our exes, how come we end up having the same frustrations, and we hear the same arguments all over again? If you’re a cosmic warrior like me, then you probably guessed that the common thread that bonds all these circumstances together is…you.

Your partners might be completely different, but you’re the one thing they have in common. So what do we do when we don’t know how to evaluate ourselves? We use astrology to look for insights! They say some signs simply set impossible standards for their lovers, such as Virgo and Capricorn, while others have a hard time taking off their rose-colored glasses and getting real, such as Saggitarius or Pisces.

They also say that some are more combative than they should be (naturally, our Aries and Scorpios), while others are incredibly complacent (Cancer and Libra). So let’s see what the stars say about you and the way you behave in a relationship!

Aries (March 21- April 19)

Whether you love it or hate it, the first sign of the zodiac is known to be straightforward and very honest (a bit brutal, even). Aries are known to have this toddler-style approach to anything in life, as they are constantly fueled by their passion, and as their fiery dispositions are always there to sustain their known bravery, they might also throw the occasional temper tantrum.

In the heat of the moment, these volatile signs could oftentimes end up saying things they will later wish to take back. Even if they are real treasures, they’re not everyone’s cup of tea, especially because of those explosive tendencies.

Taurus (April 20- May 20)

You might think that being stubborn gets you in places, especially if you can’t take a no for an answer, but man, the Taureans’ stubbornness gets him/her in a lot of trouble! This fixed sign isn’t very good when it comes to maintaining systems.

They always take pride in the fact that they’re extremely loyal and consistent, so when they make up their mind, there’s no turning back. As their loyalty is worthy of praise, sometimes they need a little reminder that life isn’t just black and white.

Sometimes, flexibility is good and it should be welcomed. Taureans must keep in mind that they don’t have to sacrifice their great fidelity, but their rigidity can do a number on any relationship.

Gemini (May 21- June 20)

Geminis are curious by nature, so it only makes sense that they love keeping their minds nimble. Geminis love exploring things in multiples, in the sense that you will never see them focused only on one thing: there are always several hobbies, many friend groups, and multiple jobs at the same time.

In other words, they love being busy. Given that Geminis always find their way into a great system that can satisfy pretty much all their passions and desires, they’re not the best at focusing too much energy on only one area of their life. And this might be a bit problematic when it comes to relationships! Long-term relationships require a lot of commitment, but also hard work, and attention. Good luck getting that from a Gemini!

Cancer (June 21- July 22)

Cancers have a very special role in the zodiac: to be your mom/dad! The first water sign, these celestial signs are governed by the moon (and mood), which makes them extremely nurturing, compassionate, and full of sensitive dispositions. Did I mention they’re extremely moody?

Well, I didn’t say it enough! Crabs must protect their soft interiors with harder shells, so when these water signs feel a little bit threatened, they immediately want to retreat into their armor. However, their defensive habits might have a downside: if you hurt them, Cancers have these claws, and they can pinch like hell, so be careful!

Leo (July 23- August 22)

These fire signs are governed by the Sun, so needless to say how much they love to shine! On their brighter days, they will baffle you with how warm, generous, and compassionate they can be. However, if these sun lions feel that someone might steal the spotlight, their disposition can suddenly change.

Leos are known to have big egos, so if they feel someone tries to eclipse them, they become jealous, possessive, and controlling in a matter of seconds. Leos must remember at all times that relationships are all about reciprocity and that their lovers also deserve to glow. If Leo’s aren’t ready to share the stage, it might damage their relationship.

Virgo (August 23- September 22)

Virgos are incredibly intellectual and observant, and there’s nothing they love more than creating systems that keep them organized and logical. Even if they have remarkable skills that would make them extremely valuable in any workplace, they might cause some difficulties within a relationship.

As we all know, even the happiest couples argue now and then, and it’s normal to have the occasional arguments. However, Virgos seem to have a hard time accepting it. They want to be PERFECT, and when things aren’t perfect at all (including them), they become obsessed with “fixing everything”. If you’re a Virgo, try to remember that sometimes fixing things is not the answer. Sometimes time does a better job than you could ever do.

Libra (September 23- October 22)

Libras love being “taken”. As their sign shows, they always seek “balance”: the ideal pinch of salt to their pepper, the Bonnie to their Clyde. They’re obsessed with harmony, so these air signs will avoid conflict like a disease.

Another thing about them: at first, their diplomatic approaches might seem ideal, but you’ll soon come to the realization that it’s one of the main reasons why a relationship might end up being damaged goods.

If it were to ask a Libra, excessive fighting is caused by great incompatibility. In reality, every relationship could benefit from a tiny bit of active discord, which is a hard thing to accept, if you’re constantly trying to avoid conflict like only a Libra could.

Scorpio (October 23- November 21)

These super intense and shadow-dwelling water signs care a lot about their emotional privacy, so if a Scorpio lets you into his/her heart, be careful! When a Scorpio finally bonds with someone, their lover is locked in…forever.

Naturally, Scorpios are obsessed with maintaining power and control, so if they suspect their partner isn’t equally invested in the partnership, they will immediately become paranoid and possessive.

And when that happens, they’re not afraid to CREATE conflict just to test their partner’s devotion. I know what you’re thinking, and I think it’s safe to assume that this kind of behavior is NO ONE‘s cup of tea.

Saggitarius (November 22-December 21)

The Saggitarius sign has the spirit of a wildfire trapped within: they are super curious souls who NEED traveling, philosophy, and experimenting in their lives. They are adrenaline junkies, so it comes without saying that they love adrenaline.

The thing is, you can’t take this freedom and need to be spontaneous from them. They expect you to hop along with them, whenever, wherever. While it’s true that cruising down the Amazon River with your loved one is great for a proper Saturday afternoon plan, most people don’t wish to live like Indiana Jones for the rest of their lives. If you’re a Saggitarius, make sure you also embrace a bit of stability and routine now and then, too. It will do you good!

Capricorn (December 22- January 19)

Capricorns are the most serious and focused bosse…sorry, I meant signs in the zodiac. They’re ruled by Saturn, the stoic planet, the ruler of time and karma, so their go-to in any romantic bond is long-term relationships and stability.

Capricorns are famously known to be extremely ambitious, we could even say they are workaholics. Don’t worry, they don’t mind, they’d be glad to hear that. So far so good, right? The problem is that their lover’s drive to match or even exceed their own.

Even if the whole “power couple” thing can be fun and shiny for a while, when one partner is pushing too hard, resentment and discontent settles in. But if the Capricorn makes a habit out of treating their partner like an assistant, the relationship is doomed.

Aquarius (January 20- February 18)

All air signs love connecting with people, but Aquarians are more interested in society than in interpersonal relationships. Aquariuses want to see equality, justice, and egalitarianism everywhere they go. The problem is that they’re so busy making the world a better place, they oftentimes forget to go home.

Aquarians must remember that their healthy relationship might not save the world, but it will surely make their lives better. They constantly need to exercise compassion and treat their loved ones with more kindness and respect.

Pisces (February 19- March 20)

This zodiac sign is represented by two fish swimming in opposite directions, so it’s not hard to see that we’re dealing with the most ethereal water signs in the zodiac. While they’re very popular for their romantic creativity and sensibility, once you get to know a Pisces, you conclude that there’s no end to that mysterious, ethereal, spiritual-eternal…world they live in (which is, to be fair, completely different than ours). If by any chance, you’re a Pisces and you want to know more about your zodiac sign (Pisces usually do, they’re open to anything related to astrology and spirituality), then I deeply recommend you this wonderful book: Pisces: Crystal Astrology for Modern Life.

The problem is that it makes them a bit…unreliable and flaky. Pisces must remember at all times that other realities are just as important as their own. Otherwise, there’s really no way out.

If you feel you’ve read a ton of insightful info, we have more for you: 9 Steps to Walking Out of a Toxic Relationship