Is your partner in love with someone else? Let’s find out!

You’ve probably been feeling in your gut that something’s off. Your significant other seems distracted, distant, or just… different. At first, you might’ve thought it was a cause of stress or a rough patch. But now, all those little things start to add up.

Sometimes, you can sense changes in your partner, like when they avoid eye contact, keep their phone away from you, or seem emotionally distant. It’s only natural to wonder: could they be in love with someone else?

No one likes to think about this, but brushing aside these feelings won’t make them go away. Often, when someone’s heart starts to drift toward another person, you might notice some subtle (or even not-so-subtle) shifts in their behavior.

Maybe they’re not putting in as much effort into your relationship, or they suddenly have a lot of interest in a “new friend.” You might feel like the intimacy you once shared has disappeared, or their habits that used to feel so familiar have changed.

Facing these feelings head-on is the best way to gain clarity and reclaim your happiness. If something feels off, it’s important to trust your instincts. Is your partner in love with someone else? Let’s find out:

1. They seem happier, but without you

When your partner is in love with someone else, you might notice them all of a sudden smiling more, being excited, and full of energy, but when they’re with you, they act distant, uninterested, and bored.

As much as I hate saying this, if your partner’s mood shifts drastically depending on who they’re around, it could be a warning sign that something’s off. When someone falls for another person, their enthusiasm and energy naturally reflect that.

If they’re always upset or emotionally drained after spending time with you but are cheerful and unusually upbeat when talking about or with a “friend,” you can be certain it’s a red flag.

Pay attention to where their joy is coming from. If their good moods don’t come from your relationship anymore, something deeper might be going on, and you should watch out.

2. They’re emotionally distant

One of the most common signs that tells you something’s going on is emotional unavailability. When your partner used to share their worries, dreams, and thoughts with you, but suddenly keeps you at arm’s length, it might feel like you’re more like roommates than lovers. Conversations become surface-level, and no matter how much you try to reconnect, they seem distant or uninterested.

You might try to open up and get them to communicate with you, but all your efforts are in vain because they seem distracted or indifferent. According to experts, when your significant other is in love with someone else, they might invest more time and effort into their new connection, so they don’t have that much energy left to do the same with you.

As a result, they’re always emotionally distant toward you. Sadly, it can feel terrible and is a major red flag in any relationship, especially if they’re completely different from how they were in the past. So, ask yourself: Are you talking to a wall instead of your significant other? The answer will give you a clearer picture of the situation.

3. They spend more time away from you

If your significant other is always going out with “friends” or “working late” or suddenly develops new hobbies that don’t include you, you have every right to be suspicious. Independence is, without a doubt, healthy, but excessive time apart, especially if your partner tries to avoid you, can be a warning sign.

Of course, there could be countless reasons why they act this way, like being stressed, depressed, having personal issues, or simply needing some time alone, so open communication is always key. But if they used to enjoy date nights, quality time together, and long conversations, but now they only make excuses not to take part in such things, it could be a sign they’re in love with someone else.

If they seem eager to be anywhere but with you, it’s worth questioning where their heart truly lies. It’s not an easy realization, but it’s necessary for your long-term happiness and well-being.

4. You feel like you’re in a one-sided relationship

No wonder you think your partner is in love with someone else if you’re always the one putting in the effort and getting nothing in return. A healthy relationship is a partnership—it thrives on teamwork, love, and mutual investment. Without these, it turns into an exhausting, one-sided dynamic that can break even the strongest bond.

Whether it’s initiating conversations, planning dates, or showing affection, both partners should actively participate. When life happens and one can only give 20%, the other steps up with 80% extra, and vice versa. That’s how love works. But if you’re always carrying the relationship while they seem indifferent or disengaged, it’s a major red flag.

Before making assumptions, check in with your partner. A heart-to-heart conversation can clear up confusion. But at the end of the day, love should never feel one-sided. If you’re giving your all while they barely show up, it’s time to ask the hard question: Are they still in this with you, or has their heart moved on? Are they in love with someone else, or is it just a difficult time they try to overcome?

5. There are no more plans together

If your partner is in love with someone else, why would they bother making future plans with the person they’re planning to leave behind? When someone is truly invested in a relationship, they’re excited to talk about the future—weekend getaways, vacations, anniversaries, family visits, or even big life changes like moving to a new city. These moments help build a life together, and they’re precious.

But if your significant other suddenly dodges these conversations or seems uninterested, it could be because they don’t see a future with you. When someone’s heart is drifting away, they often become noncommittal, avoiding any talk that ties them down. If they once loved planning exciting adventures with you but now seem irritated at the mere thought of it, their focus might be elsewhere.

So, ask yourself: Are they pulling away, or are they already halfway out the door? There’s only one way to find out! It might not be pleasant, but it’s necessary for your happiness and emotional well-being!

6. Intimacy is different

Another drastic change you’ll notice if your partner is in love with someone else is a shift in intimacy. Physical and emotional closeness are the glue that holds a romantic relationship together. Sure, dry spells happen—let’s face it, life isn’t always a romance movie—but the key is balance. When affection, deep conversations, or intimate moments suddenly become rare—or start to feel forced—it could be a sign that their heart is elsewhere.

This shift in intimacy can show up in two ways. The first? Guilt. If your partner feels guilty for catching feelings for someone else, they might try to overcompensate, which translates into showering you with extra attention, loving gestures, and even spicing things up to make up for their emotions.

The second? Distance. They start pulling away—physically, emotionally, or both. Their mind and heart are elsewhere, and they either don’t feel the need or simply can’t bring themselves to connect with you like before. Either way, a sudden and drastic change in intimacy is something you shouldn’t ignore, especially if it’s a constant issue in your relationship.

7. You pick up fights over anything

How often do you fight? Do you get angry over the smallest things, like a forgotten trash run or unwashed dishes? While disagreements are normal in any relationship, arguing over anything and everything isn’t healthy.

If you notice your partner seems annoyed no matter what you do, it might be a sign that something’s up. Whether it’s work stress, family issues, or feelings for someone else, constantly walking on eggshells, fearing their next outburst, isn’t a feeling you should ignore.

Takeaway

Falling out of love and developing feelings for someone else is part of being human, even if it can hurt the other person in the relationship. If you suspect your partner is in love with someone else, having an honest conversation could help clear the air. It might not be easy, but it’s a necessary step to protect your peace and happiness. If you need guidance, here’s a book you should check out!

What do you think about these red flags? Have you ever been in a situation like this? How did you handle it? Leave a comment below, and let’s chat! And before you go, here’s another post from Detangle Love you won’t want to miss: Men Can’t Help but Respect Women Who Do These 5 Things