Have you ever wondered what women think about during s*x?
Intimacy is often considered a taboo subject, but let’s face it—it’s a natural part of the world, and we ALL do it. However, it’s not always just about the physical sensations. While the mood might be steamy and heavy, women’s minds can sometimes wander to a variety of thoughts—some frisky, some weird, some silly, and others, well, totally random.
From wondering how their partners enjoy the experience and what they think about their moves to the eternal battle with body image insecurities, the mental chatter can be just as intense as the steamy activity in the bed itself.
So, what exactly do women think about during intimacy? Is it all about great moves, passionate kisses, whispered words, and connection, or are there moments of distraction, doubt, and even downright confusion? The mind of a lady is a wonderful yet terrifying place, so if you dare to enter it, you might be surprised—or shocked.
But enough with the chit-chat, because I know you’re here for the juicy part, and I’m going to give it to you! So, without further ado, here are all the funny, spicy, and weird things women think about during s*x:
1. When it’s over
Okay, this might be a tough pill to swallow, but let’s be honest: when you’re on a date with a woman and things get intimate for the first time, it might not always go as smoothly as you hoped.
For example, she might not feel as attracted to you as she expected or could be carrying emotional baggage from past experiences, making it hard for her to fully engage in the moment—even if she’s physically present. It’s possible she might mentally disconnect, or even question whether it was the right choice.
But don’t take it personally. This doesn’t reflect on you or your appeal. Often, it’s more about where she’s at emotionally and how the situation brings up feelings that are unrelated to you.
2. What they want
Another thing women think about during intimacy is what they want. I know you might say that she could simply ask for a move or special treatment, but sometimes, she might be shy and think that if she says it in her mind, the request might telepathically reach you.
If you’re between the sheets with someone who seems shy and doesn’t say much, you could take the matter into your own hands and ask them what they want. Who knows, maybe you’ll get them to open up, and they’ll find it hot too.
3. About shaving
Yes, you’ve read that right. Sometimes, as much fun as they have with their partners, women think about their shaved bodies. Did she miss a spot? Can you see anything? Will you feel something weird if you grab her leg and all the hairs come into play?
What can we say? Maybe this fiery experience took her by surprise and she didn’t have time to prep. After all, the most important thing is that you both feel incredible.
…Let’s continue with all the things women think about during intimacy because we have some juicy things to share!
4. Her ex
Continuing with all the crazy things women think about during that spicy time, their ex might also pop into their head all of a sudden. It’s not that they don’t have feelings for you or don’t enjoy the experience, because they do, but comparison is part of human nature, and since she’s been intimate with both of you, her mind might be going elsewhere even if it’s just for a split second.
5. Her favorite celeb
Is there anyone who has never fantasized about someone outside their relationship while being intimate with their partner? You’ve probably done it at least once. Speaking of that, one of the things women think about during that frisky time with you is their favorite celeb.
Whether it’s a gorgeous actor, a stunning singer, a gym bro, or maybe even a fabulous woman from Hollywood, every woman deserves a brief, harmless imaginary fling with someone she admires. And hey, if she’s picturing herself running her fingers over Brad Pitt’s perfectly sculpted abs while she’s scratching your back, I’d say you both come out winners.
6. The Big O
Oh yes, the big O is fantastic, but reaching it can be stressful, especially if you’ve only just started being intimate. She might feel pressured to signal that she’s on the way there—even when she’s still trying to figure out whether she likes that position or not. Some women may overthink every little detail: “Am I breathing too loudly? Should I be saying more? What if I look ridiculous right now?”
For some, it becomes a performance rather than a pleasurable experience, all because they feel obligated to “achieve” something rather than enjoy the ride. And let’s not forget the infamous fake O—sometimes it’s not about deception but about avoiding awkwardness or awkward silence. After all, faking it can feel easier than explaining she wants to try from a different angle and at a slower pace maybe.
7. Her body
Even though they know it’s important to enjoy their time and the person they’re sharing it with, some women find themselves focusing on their bodies during the experience. They may worry about things like whether their stomach is flat or how their breasts look compared to when they were in their 20s. While they want to look good, they sometimes forget that feeling good is just as important.
8. Someone walking in
It’s the middle of the night, you’re having fun with your partner, and you’re focused on giving your best performance to ensure you both have an unforgettable time. Suddenly, you notice her absence, which might be a sign of anxiety.
One thing some women might think about during intimate moments is the possibility of someone walking into the room. This concern arises if there are others in the house or if you’re in a more public space. Did she lock the door? Did someone wake up and need something? Could anyone hear what’s happening? These are just a few of the questions that could be running through her mind.
9. Does she do enough?
She wants you to enjoy yourself as much as she does, so if you notice her seeming distracted, she might be thinking about how to switch things up and take the entire experience to a new level. Your partner might think about moving more, saying more frisky things, whispering, putting her hands somewhere; you get the idea.
Hint: If this is the case, you might probably notice her subtly smiling too, so you know you’re in for a good time!
10. What can you eat afterward
Another thing women think about during intimacy is what they’re going to eat after. Being passionate with one another is indeed important in a relationship, but let’s not forget that love goes through the stomach, as some people say.
She’s having fun with you, but she might be hungry afterward—so why not share a meal? Whether it’s pasta, a burger with fries, or something sweet, you both deserve a treat after such a lovely and fun experience, don’t you think?
What are your thoughts on these things women think about during spicy time? Let’s chat in the comments below! If you take your knowledge to the next level and see what women think about, check out this book. Until next time, here’s another spicy article from Detangle Love: 10 Ways Not to Get Caught Cheating