Can’t resist cheating on your partner?

Infidelity in any committed relationship is the definition of a breach of trust. No matter if you think you can get away with it if you are tempted to cheat on your partner, you should first consider whether or not you really want to be in a relationship at all.

You might have fallen out of love with your significant other, or you might not be in the right state of mind for a monogamous relationship right now.

Whatever it might be, the best thing you can do is leave the relationship before betraying your significant other. But if you’re already caught up in an entangled situation, there are a couple of steps you can take to keep them in the dark about your activities, then throw them off the trail if they start to become suspicious.

Keeping them in the dark

Again, we’ll say this every time we get the chance. Think twice before cheating on your partner. While people might have plenty of reasons as to why they’d consider cheating, whether it’s being angry at their partner, feeling trapped in a relationship they weren’t ready for to begin with or which has simply grown dull and lifeless, or taking out their frustration about something totally unrelated to the relationship, it’s still a breach of trust.

There are many negative consequences associated with infidelity in a monogamous relationship. First, you might be tempted to think that you can get away with it and not get caught.

But even if you do, studies have proven that cheating partners experience higher levels of shame and guilt as a consequence of their actions.

Set up a separate email address

One of the easiest and sloppiest ways to get caught while having an affair is by leaving evidence of it around inaccessible places. You need to create a new email address to use only to communicate with the person or people you’re cheating with.

Also, make sure you don’t tell anyone else about it or use it for anything other than your secret affairs. If you use this account as a burner account for online updates or to catch spam, it will be more normalized.

You want there to be a specific level of anxiety attached to this account. This way, you will make sure you log out every single time you access it. Make sure you only write to your affair through this account, and never through your regular account.

Keep your regular account logged in on your computer as you’d normally do, so your partner has full access to it if they become more suspicious and start snooping. They won’t find anything there.

Clear browser history, but only partially

Every time you do anything online related to your affair, make sure you take a moment to clear your web browser’s history of the sites that are slightly related to your affair.

Also, note that this applies to more than just your fake email address. Give Yelp reviews for a restaurant where you plan to meet them, directions to a park where you plan to meet them, and reservation sites for hotels and such.

Also, don’t clear your entire browser history, because it will look suspicious. Nobody keeps their entire history clean. Instead, we’d advise you to go through your history and manually delete suspicious websites as soon as you are done using them.

Use the “private browsing” mode on your web browser

One of the most efficient ways to make sure that you don’t accidentally leave any evidence of your activities behind in you browser history is to make sure you use the “private browsing” setting when you do something you don’t want to get caught doing.

If, for instance, you use a major browser to surf the internet, you probably also have a private browsing option available. Safari, Chrome, Firefox, Opera, and Explorer all let you use the internet without recording evidence of it on your computer.

It’s also worth noting that this doesn’t mean you’re totally anonymous while browsing. Websites could still know your IP address. As a result, you might get targeted ads generated from your “private” browsing session.

If you want to avoid getting caught through those targeted ads, you need to make sure you close out all private windows every time you finish using them. It will delete the cookies that lead to suspicious targeted ads.

Lock your cell phone

If your phone is already locked and your partner doesn’t know the code, you’re good. But if your phone isn’t locked or your partner knows the code, then you need to re-secure the phone.

You need to come up with a believable explanation for why you need to secure the phone. You might say that some people at work got into it and discovered private pictures of you and your partner.

If your partner knows the code, it would be even more suspicious now to suddenly insist on privacy. Don’t try to change the password, and also don’t use your phone for any suspicious activities.

Use your phone minimally

If your partner notices a sudden spike in calls or texts to your affair’s number, it might raise suspicions. You should keep phone calls brief, and texts only when needed. The majority of your communication should be only conducted through your designated email account.

Buy a prepaid cell phone

A prepaid cell phone would let you communicate with your affair without worrying about the charges that could show up on a phone bill. But it’s still highly risky because being caught with a very strange, secret phone would make the most trusting partner wonder.

If you use a prepaid cell phone, you should be extremely careful about not getting caught with it. You should prepare an excuse just in case your partner does find it in the end.

Don’t use credit cards on suspicious purchases

Any kind of questionable charges, whether it’s hotel rooms or out-of-town businesses will instantly show up on your monthly statement. Suspiciously large charges like dinners for two at a nice restaurant could also attract attention.

Whenever you make a purchase you don’t get caught making it, make sure you use cash rather than a card to avoid leaving a paper trail behind.

Throwing off their suspicion

You can easily laugh at their suspicions instead of getting mad. If you do get mad, you might be signaling to your partner that you have quite a negative reaction to their accusation, rather than a bewildered one.

Anger could also transition rapidly into an argument, and arguments are generally drawn out and linger somewhere in the back of the mind.

Talk to them about their suspicion

You should talk to them about their suspicion. After having an initially lighthearted reaction, you really don’t want to run away from having a serious conversation. This could make them feel like you are not really taking their feelings seriously.

That kind of resentment can also linger and fester, so what you want is to address this head-on. You can tell them that you are sorry they feel the way they do and that you didn’t even know that you caused them to feel insecure in the relationship.

You should also allow them to voice the concerns they have on the matter, don’t interrupt them, and don’t get defensive!

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