Can you recognize the signs that your partner is deceiving you?
Deceiving someone is easier than some may think! Unfortunately, it is also harder to spot than we would like, especially when it comes from the people we trust the most, like our family, friends, and partners!
Being deceived can take many forms since lying is not the only part of it. Your partner may be dishonest with you by hiding the truth, making up stories, misleading you or someone else, and even distorting facts for their own benefit!
No matter how we put it, deceiving someone is the best and surefire way of losing their trust! So why are people going down this path?
Sure, we have all told our significant other some white lies here and there. Like telling them a joke they made was funny when it really wasn’t all that funny or that their haircut is not as bad as they think it is.
There is nothing wrong with that since these are just small, harmless white lies, but when it comes to bigger lies and a pattern of lying all the time, you know there is something wrong!
Deception, when it leaves the realm of “white lies to spare someone’s feelings,” ends up being dangerous, and they can easily cover some bigger things like cheating and even gaslighting!
If you are ready to see all the ways in which someone can be deceiving, keep on reading! We have gathered the most common ways people deceive their partners, and you can easily check them out here.
Have you ever had a deceiving partner? What did they deceive you about? Share your story in the comments!
1. Concealing finances
The money talk is never easy, but there are times when you have to bite the bullet and discuss your partner’s finances before things get out of hand.
One of the things people are deceitful about is, generally, finances. Be it that they do not share their true finances or they are trying to upkeep appearances by hiding spending habits and even debts, this type of “white lie” can derail really fast.
And you do not have to think about heavy gambling; your partner may even be lying about how much a new pair of shoes has cost, just out of embarrassment.
Most dishonest couples deceive each other about finances, according to research.
2. Telling white lies
We have brought up white lies before, and we have all been guilty of telling one or some at one time or another.
There are so many white lies people in a couple tell each other that it can sometimes be hard to keep track of all of them. It is nothing bad when it comes to sparing the other person’s feelings, but when one part gets used to lying to the other, then it can become a problem.
Some people gradually start lying about more than just the little white lies, and even if it is out of not wanting a confrontation, they can easily escalate.
So while we are all guilty of this to some extent, keep an eye out if it seems like your partner is always telling white lies.
3. Embellishing their backgrounds
Deceitful partners end up lying about a lot of things, including their backgrounds. While this may seem like a major thing that would be hard to hide, it is one of the most common, especially in times of social media and dating apps.
Deceiving partners will end up changing their backgrounds to sound more desirable, or they may even embellish who they truly are completely just to get you to approve of them.
Worst thing? When they are caught in the wrong, they play it off like it is nothing bad, after they have fabricated their whole persona to gain your trust.
4. Lying
White lies are one thing, but we talked about escalation. This ends up being when your partner has gotten so used to lying to you that they do not think twice about it.
This can be anything, for example telling you they are working late but, in reality, they are out with their colleagues or worse, at a poker game gambling away their savings.
It can also show in other moments, with them fibbing more often than not and justifying it by saying that they did not want to upset you.
Somehow it is on you that they have lied, and they do not take accountability.
5. Omitting information
One sign of a deceitful partner is when they are not telling you the whole truth. Sure, we have all done things that we are not particularly proud of, but not sharing them with your partner makes you a liar.
Sure, it is lying by omission, but it is lying either way.
In some cases, you do not want to spill the beans about something embarrassing, but it shows that there is a communication and trust issue.
And all those little things people omit can end up being serious at one point and can lead to a disastrous relationship.
6. Covering up lies
Regrettably, there may have been moments when we’ve told a lie, misled our partner, and then gone to great lengths to cover our tracks, hoping they won’t find out what we’ve done.
For instance, we may have snooped around their room a little, broken something in the process, and made up a lie to try and cover it up.
7. Hiding bad habits
White lies escalate to big lies and lying by omission, and this can end up hiding bad habits.
Remember that if your partner is hiding a gambling “hobby” from you or a regular drinking habit, it is not about them not wanting to upset you, but rather hiding a bad habit.
A lot of deceiving partners end up hiding the worst parts of themselves and not caring about how it is going to impact the other person.
8. Gaslighting
The worst forms of deception can end up becoming gaslighting. This is where you end up doubting that you have been seeing certain signs of deception and believing whatever your partner is saying.
In reality, they are trying to make you doubt yourself and your memory, successfully manipulating you into believing all their lies.
It can also manifest as them never owning up to any sort of mistake. It will always be redirected toward you and even denied, so much so that you will end up being the bad guy in all situations.
It is not on them to lie to you; it is on you, who is a horrible person, that you do not trust them and accuse them, even when you have all the right to question their behaviors when they stop adding up.
Stay strong and confide in someone you trust if you feel like you are being gaslighted!
9. Cheating
For some, the ultimate form of deception manifests as infidelity. Your partner may not be hiding an addiction or just having a lying or self-esteem problem; it may just be that they are hiding their tracks as they are cheating on you!
A lot of partners end up being surprised at how well their significant other lied to them when it came to their hidden physical or emotional affairs!
This does not mean that you should jump to conclusions, but rather that if you suspect something, you should try to find out the truth, no matter how much it hurts!
There is lots of research done on the topic, and if you have been lied to by a partner before, know that you are not alone. When my ex turned out to be a lying, horrible person, this book helped me see clearly all the signs I had been shown over time!
If you are worried about these signs, then you may end up seeing more of a pattern than you would like. A lot of the time, being given the silent treatment or not being listened to at all is another type of partner abuse. If you are wondering if your partner is not listening to you, check out these frequent signs here!