Spot potential manipulators.
It’s highly important to spot people who have manipulative tendencies. Awareness is probably one of the first steps toward avoiding a manipulative situation or person. You need to look out for certain behaviors (like the ones we enlisted above) and also keep an eye out for those who:
- want to have their own way, nonstop.
- won’t accept a no.”
- won’t stop until they succeed.
- make excuses for hurtful or damaging behavior.
- frequently make you feel guilty.
- act very differently, depending on the circumstances.
Be assertive
When you feel that someone is going out of their way to manipulate you, be assertive: stand up for yourself but also respect his or her needs. At first, you need to recognize how the other person views the whole situation. Then, you need to express your needs in a direct manner.
This way, you will project strength and confidence, especially when you are being specific about your desires and wishes. Be direct and persistent, and use as many “I” statements as possible in order to avoid generalities and accusations. For example, you might say, “I wouldn’t feel comfortable if I did that,” instead of blaming the other party.
