Does She Have Any Secrets?
Are you in love? That’s great! But can you say for sure that you know her well enough? Even if men are generally the ones who are accused of hiding things from a partner, that’s not always the case. Sometimes, it’s the other way around.
For some reason, we don’t hear much about women hiding things from their dates or lovers, so many men out there are fooled into thinking that what they see is what they get. But that’s not entirely true.
Many women work hard to portray themselves as “perfect women” so they can be seen as attractive, even if their past is well hidden. In some cases, a bunch of little white lies are totally innocuous and don’t mean a thing. If you want to make sure you know everything there is to know about your partner, here are some of the most common secrets she might be hiding from you.
Her previous partners
How much do you know about her dating history? Not that it would change anything, but it’s still important to know how much and what kind of baggage your current partner might bring to the table.
After all, our experiences shaped us into what we are today. For example, what if she was married before? That’s definitely something you would want to know. Or, what if she has children? Not that this would be the general rule, but some people might have their own reasons for hiding their past.
And trust me, in one way or another, if you decide to blend your life with your partner’s, at some point this past of hers will come back to haunt both of you.
How much she loved her ex
If you are dating a divorcee or even someone fresh out of a serious or tumultuous relationship, you need to be mindful of something known as the “rebound law” that so many women out there follow. It’s never a smart choice to date someone who’s recently left a long-lasting or deep relationship.
But this rule is definitely a bit difficult to follow. What if she’s the sweetest girl you’ve ever met? She could be smiling on the outside and thinking about her former lover at the same time on the inside.
Truth be told, she will never confess the depths of her love for him, because first of all, it’s not a nice thing to do, and second of all, it isn’t right either. However, you should take note if she is still posting or viewing photos of the two of them.
How much did the breakup ruin her?
On the same note, it definitely pays to know who broke up in her last relationship. For instance, if she was the one who got dumped, then she might be hiding some anger towards her ex as any other healthy human out there.
However, pay attention not to end up as the one who experiences fragments of behaviors that are actually intended for her ex, while she still masters the art of finding a way to justify her actions. You have to face it; if she hasn’t had the time so far to heal her wounds, then you might be in for a rough ride without any warning in advance.
A word to the wise: you might want to start out as friends, slowly get the inside scoop beforehand, and proceed with caution.
Finances
Financial issues, on the other hand, might be the ultimate demise, especially if either of the partners isn’t quite honest about his or her financial situation. For instance, what if she declared bankruptcy? Is there any inexplicable amount of debt you might have to deal with later on?
Is she someone who’s mindful of the way she spends money? The whole point is that no one really wants to spend their lives with a liability, at least not from a financial point of view. In some cases, before a serious relationship begins, financial snapshots need to be provided on both sides.
If both of you have had and still deal with some financial difficulties, then the relationship might be doomed just from a financial perspective. Financial woes are definitely one of the top reasons couples break up and divorce.
Appearance enhancements
If you love a natural look and your new love interest looks astounding, how would you feel if you found out that much of her physical looks aren’t even real? Of course, breast augmentations are wildly common now.
But what if her hair, back, eyelashes, lips, and nails are also totally fake? How would that make you feel? In fact, what you need to do is question whether or not you are fine with being with someone who might prefer this type of enhancement.
If so, then I can hear the bells ringing! But if you’re not totally cool with it, you need to recalibrate to reality and realize that you might subscribe to a series of plastic interventions and other types of enhancements in the long run.
Cheating
Naturally, women are prone to being curious about their partner’s “body count.” And considering that sexual activities are on the rise, it truly makes sense that the male in the relationship would be just as curious.
After all, you are probably wondering if she ever cheated before, and if she did, how many times? Will her answer be what you expect to hear, or will it be the truth? There’s also another element worth taking into consideration: if she’s younger, it might make a difference, but this is not the case if both are mature enough. And at the end of the day, once a cheater, always a cheater, is not necessarily a golden rule.
Lying about college attendance
For me, this one’s pretty serious. Why would you lie about your past? If there’s anything I can’t wrap my head around, it’s people who would rather lie about their achievements than truly reveal themselves.
After all, you both promise to be there for one another in the long haul. Isn’t it the point of everything to be truthful? I mean, the way I see it, relationships are great when the two of them are completely honest with each other and accept everything about one another.
What’s the point of adding another person to your life who doesn’t know the truth about you? So yes, while I might understand why someone would hide the truth when it comes to their achievements, I still believe honesty should come first.
Online dating experiences
You met her through a mutual friend, but you also hear she has been an Internet dater in the past. She doesn’t like to talk about it, but have you ever wondered why? For instance, is she a 3-month wonder? Or is there any sustainability?
If you’ve never understood the whole online dating pool, it’s highly unlikely you’ll enjoy the fact that she has been doing it for many years and she can practically get back out there the minute you two have an argument. Are there backup guys waiting in line if your relationship fails?
Before you go, you might find this book insightful. We surely did.
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