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Feelings shared and expressed from a comfortable distance
You might have noticed this yourself, but unhealthy patterns of relating are the main reasons why people’s hearts are closing to one another. Over time, if you’re not careful and mindful of your relationship, your conversations become reports, and little feelings are actually communicated.
Couples go silent for days or weeks in a row, fighting fiercely for whose turn it is to wash the dishes or knit-picking each other constantly. When you lock into such patterns of automatic conversion, you are basically performing the “dance of distance.”
What really matters is how feelings are expressed because, at times, you might be way too afraid to speak your mind. You might think that your spouse will be quick to judge or even reject you, but in many cases, that’s not the case.
In fact, do you ever feel listened to? At the same time, how well do you listen to your partner? I know that being vulnerable can be extremely frightening at times, but relationships require you to buckle up and take risks for closeness. Don’t be afraid to be yourself.