Are you dating a player?

So, have you recently met someone who is so gorgeous-looking, put together, confident, charming, nice, and loving, someone who seems too good to be true? It’s like they always know what to say, and you find yourself fantasizing about them. But something feels off. One minute they’re showing you attention and flirting, and the next day, they don’t even text you. Does this sound familiar?

If you’ve got that weird feeling in the pit of your stomach, making you feel sick, you might be dating a player—someone who is a master at making you feel special while keeping their options wide open. These people are smart and experienced.

Think of them as smooth operators who can easily keep you hooked without giving you too much. But don’t worry—once you finish reading this article, you’ll be aware of all the games they use, and you’ll know, once and for all, how to protect your energy from them.

So, before you invest too much of your time and heart, take a closer look. Do they avoid labels, trying their best not to become your girlfriend or boyfriend? Do their stories just not add up? Are they overly secretive about their social media or phones? It’s time to uncover the truth.

Without further ado, here are all the signs you’re dating a player. Let’s spot the red flags together and learn how to walk away from a toxic relationship before it’s too late:

What exactly is a player?

According to intimacy and relationship experts, a player is someone who toys with the feelings and emotions of the people they’re dating. They stay away from telling the truth, only care about themselves, and behave in shady ways.

These people try their best to keep you on the hook without investing too much in their relationships. You can ask for respect or commitment, but they won’t give you any of that, because everything is a simple game to them.

…So, how do they get you to like or even fall for them? These are some of the most popular tactics they use:

1. Love-bombing

At first, it seems like everything is fun and games. You just met someone and feel like you’re really hitting it off. You have a nice time together, you’re complimented a lot, and you’re constantly told how wonderful, beautiful, nice, and sweet you are.

Even if you didn’t like them at first, you somehow changed your mind, especially since they’re so nice to you. When you’re dating a player, they’re more likely to come on strong, but it’s only a facade.

Showering you with compliments and telling you exactly what you want or need to hear—without making any effort to get to know the real you or opening up about themselves—is just a love-bombing technique.

This is because they’re motivated to make you like them, drop your defenses, and win you over. According to experts, this is how players reach their goals, whether it’s control, feeling superior, or getting you to sleep with them faster.

If their compliments don’t seem sincere and you realize that you know nothing about each other, watch out—you might be dating a player!

2. They keep going MIA

Hey, life happens, and everyone has moments when they have to deal with things themselves, so being available for your partner isn’t always possible. While this is understandable, both partners should still make an effort to communicate and support each other.

When you’re dating a player, the person you thought liked you so much is more likely to go “missing” for days or even weeks on end. You might fall for their vague explanations, like being busy with family issues or having to go on an impromptu work trip, but the thing that will make you suspicious is the fact that they won’t answer their phone, won’t reply to your texts, and will simply disappear.

And if you dare to mention this to them, don’t expect them to act alright. They’re more likely to tell you that you’re being controlling and they don’t need something like this. This happens because they’re not emotionally available and only mimic intimacy when it’s right for them.

3. It’s all about hitting the sheets

When you’re dating a player, all they want is instant gratification. At that moment, you’re the most amazing person on the planet, and they’ll do anything to have fun between the sheets with you.

It’s like you’re a prize they must get their hands on ASAP, so they’ll always find ways to keep up with you for late catch-ups, drinks, or snacks, or suggest that they come over to your place to hang out more.

But once they’ve had their fun and their physical needs have been met, they’re more likely to become cold or distant. Don’t be surprised if there’s no cuddle session or if they don’t spend the night afterward, because that’s all part of dating a player.

4. You do all the work

Another “perk” of dating a player is the fact that you do all the work. If you’re the one who always texts or calls first, initiates the meet-ups, or always plans out the cutest dates, you should hear some alarm bells ringing because you’re dating a player who’s not invested in your relationship (if there is one in the first place).

It’s normal for both people to make an effort in a relationship, because constantly being the one who initiates things can be a red flag, according to experts. To make sure you’re indeed involved with someone who’s not committed, pay attention to the other signs mentioned in this article, and don’t forget to always listen to your gut. If it’s something that doesn’t feel right, watch out!

…If you feel like you’re dating a player and want to learn more about this subject, here’s a book that will help you!

5. They don’t give too much details

Another sign you’re dating a player is the fact that you don’t know much about them. They might tell you a few things so you don’t get suspicious, such as their phone number, social media handles, or where they live or work, but that’s pretty much it.

They won’t share personal details or their life and will give you vague information when you ask things that are too personal. All these things are warning signs, and when you pay attention to them, you’ll realize they’ve tricked you into a false sense of security. You’re not actually becoming close to them because you have no idea who they really are.

6. You don’t know how they really feel about you

Dating a player means that you can never be certain about how they feel about you. If your head is always in a spin, there’s probably a good reason behind it. Being involved with someone who doesn’t want to invest their time and feelings into a relationship can feel exhausting, confusing, and disappointing, but that’s how it is when you fall for an emotionally unavailable person.

These people are typically pros at changing their behavior from love-bombing to being MIA, or from being ultra-attentive to you to not asking you to meet up for days. This situation will take you through different highs and lows, making you think that they care about you, but they’re busy. Well, think again, because it might only be a facade!

Takeaway

Dating a player is never easy or pleasant, but it can teach you valuable lessons about your worth and what you want to get out of a relationship. Always be sincere with your partner, tell them how you feel, and tell them how you wish to be treated. If they don’t seem to care about your requests, call it quits.

Remember that your peace and happiness are always important, and you don’t have to settle for anything less than special! If you feel like you’re dating a player, pay attention to how you feel, take a closer look at their behavior, and RUN!

What are your thoughts on these signs you’re falling for the wrong person? Have you ever had any experiences like this? I would love to know what you think, so leave a comment below, and let’s chat! Until next time, here’s another article you won’t want to miss: 8 Telltale Signs Your Partner Has a Fear of Commitment