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7 Friendship Pitfalls to Avoid and Save Your Bonds

Have you been guilty of the following friendship pitfalls?

Nurturing friendships is integral to life, yet it’s not always smooth sailing. As we navigate the intricate web of social interactions, we inevitably encounter stumbling blocks that threaten the bonds we hold dear.

Picture this: You’re strolling down the path of companionship, basking in the warmth of shared laughter and trust, when suddenly, a subtle rift forms.

It could result from an annoying habit or an unintentional oversight, but its impact resonates, casting shadows over the once-deep bond. These friendship pitfalls lurking in our interactions can unravel the fabric of even the longest relationships.

From communication breakdowns to jealousy’s toxic embrace, each pitfall presents a unique challenge to the endurance of our friendships.

But, armed with understanding from Detangle Love, you can navigate these treacherous waters and emerge stronger, fortifying the foundations of your most cherished connections.

Join us as we uncover the secrets to avoiding 7 friendship pitfalls and preserving the bonds you hold dear.

Photo by Ground Picture at Shutterstock

Friendship pitfall: Sharing their good news for them

You would never share your friend’s personal issues, but be careful about sharing any good news that isn’t yours, either, because that’s a huge friendship pitfall.

Even sharing positive things like a pregnancy, a job promotion, or an engagement without their permission can be annoying because it steals their ability to share it themselves. Revealing good news to others is delightful. You don’t want to take that away from anyone.

You should simply be mindful of discussing anything personal that could be seen as invading their privacy. If you’re unsure whether it’s OK to share the news, ask them first. And if you’ve already jumped the gun by accident, do your friend the favor of apologizing for the snafu.

Friendship pitfall: Pushing your religious or political views

You might see it as sharing something important, but constantly bringing up controversial topics could annoy your friends, especially if their views aren’t the same as yours.

Calling it the “politics of personal destruction,” behavioral analyst Wendy Patrick, Ph.D, describes this as an annoying habit that can creep into friendships with differing world views.

If you frequently talk about your religious or political views in a way that clarifies you are right and your friends are wrong, that tends to get old fast.

Remember that it’s good to have friends who are different from you, who will challenge your ideas, and who will discuss important issues with you.

It helps you build empathy and learn more about the world. Insisting that people should share your views without keeping an open mind is incredibly annoying to others.

So, instead, you should have conversations about complex issues with your friends, but begin the conversation with how much you have in common and build from there.

Everyone wants jobs, national security, good education, safe communities, and access to quality health care. But don’t lecture them about it. Make sure you’re having a discussion, not an argument.

Friendship pitfall: Constantly texting throughout the day

Texting back within a day: fine. Texting all day long: big no-no! Some people’s love language is texting, but you should be careful not to overwhelm your friends with your every thought.

You may love to send quotes, memes, videos, GIFs, and little thoughts to check in with people you care about. Unfortunately, some folks feel annoyed by constant phone notifications and steady requests for attention. It’s not that they don’t care about you.

They simply can’t deal with that much interaction. That’s why uninvited all-day chit-chat can be a friendship pitfall. There’s no “right” answer to how many texts are too many in one day. So if you don’t know, ask your friends how they feel about it!

Check in about the frequency of your messages and respect their wishes if they prefer fewer notifications. Some may like to chat over the phone or save meaningful discussions for face-to-face meetings. Find the groove that works for you and your best friend.

Friendship Pitfall
Photo by Roman Samborskyi at Shutterstock

Friendship pitfall: Flaking on your plans

Making plans and canceling at the last minute is one of the top annoyances people have with friends. Would you blame them? You may see it as poor time management, but when it happens all the time, it’s a clear signal to your friends that they aren’t a priority.

Besides that, when you cancel at the last minute, you frequently cause other inconveniences your friends have to deal with, like changing transportation plans, reservations, or activities. You should learn how to manage your time better.

When you commit to something, put it in your calendar immediately. If you have to cancel something, make sure you let them know in advance and make an effort to reschedule for a time that will work with both of your schedules.

And this should only be an occasional issue. If you constantly need to cancel, you should rethink your schedule and what you say yes to.

Friendship pitfall: Zoning out while your friend is speaking

Thanks to social media and all the other catalysts giving us quick dopamine blows, many of us have a difficult time concentrating when others are talking. But if a lack of communication is one of the most significant relationship killers, then attention is the antidote.

And the primary way we show people attention is by listening to them. Too many of us zone out while a friend talks, thinking about something else. But people can tell when you’re only listening halfway, and it can get annoying if it happens repeatedly.

So instead, put your phone away and give your friend your full attention when they’re saying something. And watch your body language, as well.

Are your eyes glazed over? Are you sitting with an open posture? Don’t turn away from your friend or cross your arms over your chest, and smile and nod to encourage them to keep speaking.

Friendship pitfall: Gossiping about other people

Take a close look at the subjects you bring up with friends. Gossip is one of the most rude conversation practices. Some friendships are built on speaking badly about mutual acquaintances.

But even though this can feel like bonding in the moment, it damages your friendship and can get rather annoying pretty quickly if others are all you have to talk about. Speaking negatively about others to your friends shows that you’re not loyal or trustworthy.

After all, if you’re so ready to speak poorly about others, it’s only natural for your friends to wonder what you say about them when behind their backs. You should practice empathy whenever you can.

And before you decide to speak negatively about someone, remind yourself how you would feel if they were to say those things about you. There are a million exciting things to talk about. Choose one of those instead of gossiping.

Friendship Pitfall
Photo by fizkes at Shutterstock

Friendship pitfall: Interrupting when they’re speaking

Listening without interrupting is the first rule of friendship. And yet, it’s amazing how many of us still interrupt the people we care about. Nothing is more annoying than being repeatedly interrupted when you’re trying to get a point across. It isn’t just verbal, either.

Other ways of interrupting your friends can include getting distracted by a task, checking your phone, speaking to someone else, and watching TV while they’re talking. So don’t speak when they’re speaking.

Give them your full attention and be e an intentional and mindful listener. Of course, you can show interest in what they say by making small affirmative comments or nodding but don’t interrupt. This will make them feel heard and understood.

Have you been guilty of these friendship pitfalls? Don’t worry. You can always fix the situation! Grab a bottle of wine from Amazon, invite your friend over for a heart-to-heart, and you’ll be back on track in no time!

And if you found this article on friendship pitfalls helpful, we highly recommend you also read: Do You Have an Inappropriate Friendship With a Married Man? Here Are 6 Signs!

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