You stand up for yourself.
When the two of you are having an argument, you and your partner could end up saying things that you don’t mean. Moreover, you might even slip a couple of things you might regret later on.
Well, you need to establish that you won’t use harsh words in the argument. Otherwise, things might escalate to a whole other level you don’t even want.
You already have intrinsic worth, and you deserve to be spoken to with kindness. You also need an apology, and you need your partner to acknowledge the hurt they might have caused you.
You choose to be vulnerable.
Vulnerability shouldn’t be demanded. Naturally, it’s a very important component of any healthy relationship, but you shouldn’t feel any pressure to open up about a rather difficult topic.
It doesn’t even matter at which stage of the relationship you’re in. If you don’t feel ready to be vulnerable, don’t push yourself too hard. You should both focus on establishing a safe foundation for communication, and it might take some time to discuss some topics and memories.
If you need a little bit of help in this area, we deeply recommend you read “Leading With Emotional Courage: How to Have Hard Conversations, Create Accountability, And Inspire Action On Your Most Important Work” by Peter Bregman.
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