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10 Ways to Stay Happily Married in Retirement

On this episode of DETANGLE

Marriage in retirement should be easy and wholesome, but in reality, it might be a bit scary since you will have all the time in the world to spend 24 hours a day together under the same roof. Some people don’t know what to do or how to keep the connection alive throughout the golden years. But don’t worry! Your friend Melissa is here to help you with a lot of great tips on how to stay happy and healthy in your marriage after retirement.

…and they lived happily ever after! 

You’ve been married to your better half for a long time, possibly decades. After spending so much time together, you have both changed, and as you reach retirement, you find yourselves home alone without kids and jobs. Nevertheless, you’ve grown accustomed to one another, know each other’s hidden negative habits, and frequently anticipate one another’s actions.

Now you are about to embark on your shared final phase of life, the “golden years.” For some couples, this may be a good thing because they already know their future plans, while for others, it might be frightening because they discover they no longer have things in common.

While you’re in doubt on how to approach the situation, some experts shared some tips that will keep your hearts burning until the end of time, and some of them are so amazing you will definitely want to try them out!

married
Photo by AlessandroBiascioli From Shutterstock

Share your visions of what retirement will be like

While your spouse envisions sitting at home and relaxing, gardening, or playing golf, you may be looking forward to years of travel and excitement. Both of them sound good, but what if, because of this, you end up arguing? Engage in discussion about things like how much time you plan to spend with your children and grandchildren and whether you wish to pursue new interests or volunteer work.

Communication is the key!

This one is related to the one above and is rather obvious, but it’s also crucial to inform each other of everything. You need to talk to someone about the credit card statement, the missed call, the traffic ticket, etc. If the relationship is making you unhappy, let your partner know. Without a suitable solution, nothing is ever solved. Don’t forget to be understanding with your spouse if they make a mistake. We all engage in it. A marriage benefits greatly from kindness and transparency.

Create a new budget and monitor your finances together

One of the main issues in every married couple’s life is money. It’s challenging to manage your money, and after you retire, you have to reconsider how money works because there will be no more fixed income. Ensure that you are in agreement because fighting over money is horrible, and the easiest way to avoid it is to once again explain what’s going on.

Remain informed and in sync with one another. Communicate, communicate, communicate! Talk about how your financial situation will change and how you’ll modify your spending habits in light of the fact that you’ll be surviving on a more constrained budget. Conflicts over money can be minimized when both partners are aware of their financial situation and agree on boundaries. Plan everything together!

Be best friends

The major key to being happily married is being with your best friend. Your partner should be the person you turn to for support most of the time, not your neighbor’s best buddy. Furthermore, be sure to be approachable for your partner as well. It is essential to be able to communicate honestly with one another.

The love of spending time together is also essential. That may seem obvious, yet too frequently, couples end up living as two lonely creatures who seldom interact. Don’t be like that! Laugh and have fun, especially during retirement when you definitely have more time to spend together. Try to make it hard to forget!

…psst! Check out: 9 Signs that Show You’re the Perfect Couple

Be polite to each other

Another tip that all married couples should keep in mind is to be polite to each other. Of course, you’ve been together for years now, and you’ve probably seen each other in your worst states. Yet you’re still together! That means you love each other very much, and despite each and every difference between the two of you, you’re still happy in this marriage.

If you reach a certain level of comfort, that doesn’t mean you have to let yourself go and be rude whenever something bugs you. Never take out your anger on your better half! Remember that they’re your best friend; treat them that way, and instead of yelling and screaming, tell them you’ve had a bad day. I am sure they will understand.

married
Photo by Dmytro Zinkevych from Shutterstock

Discuss how much time you will spend together

You’ll probably find that there are some activities you enjoy doing together and others you don’t, so you should decide how much time you’ll give each other to indulge in your separate interests. It doesn’t necessarily indicate that your partner doesn’t love you if he or she doesn’t want to spend all of their quality time with you. And don’t worry, because rarely does a couple actually enjoy each other’s company every single day.

In fact, experts say that married couples who also have separate interests and hobbies are more likely to have a happy relationship.

Say “Thank You” more often

In a recent survey, 20 different married couples were asked how many times a week they say “thank you.” And the results were discouraging: less than half of the respondents thanked their spouse after doing something nice for them. Be the change, and starting today, tell your lover that even the simple things matter. Saying “thank you” more frequently will likely encourage your partner to do more of those small gestures.

Try to be more grateful for what you have because this will bring nothing but benefits to your relationship.

Keep the romance alive

Do you and your partner still do things out of the blue? Or do you still surprise each other? If not, you might give it a try. Some married couples break the routine by having weekly date nights, which is definitely a great idea! You can also dress up for your partner and surprise them with an intimate moment or try something new. If your spouse loves flowers, bring her a bouquet for no reason. Small gestures like these are highly appreciated, and for sure they will bring you closer as well.

Dear seniors, whenever you’re in doubt about your life in retirement and you want a nice and lighthearted read, this funny book is the best choice! Flip through the pages with your spouse. Fun guaranteed!

Stay intimate

This does not require you to stay in bed for the majority of the day, but if it’s possible, you can take a day or a weekend only for this activity if that’s what you both feel like. To ensure that your needs are addressed, discuss intimacy. Whatever happens, remember that every physical touch is a means of intimacy and that this is a crucial aspect of your marriage.

Some couples that have been married for years say that even kissing or holding hands can make both you and your partner happier because these are also ways of expressing intimacy. It’s important to keep the flame bright as it’s a part of the original foundation of your marriage.

When in doubt… remember the past

The easiest method to “keep the fire burning,” according to retirees, is to recall your memories. The relationship you have been developing with your partner is strengthened when you focus on the good moments rather than the negative ones. Those who have kids discover that their bonds deepen when they become grandparents. It’s important to keep things in perspective, so remember why you got married to begin with, or make a list if that makes things easier.

Bottom line

Nobody has ever claimed that being married is simple, but most people think that it’s worth the hassle. As you and your partner mature, it’s important to communicate, accept one another as you are, and maintain respect for one another. If you stick to these suggestions, your marriage will have its most joyful period to date.

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